For the Holidays, I bit the bullet and signed up for the Playstation Plus service (I did this assuming my PS3 isn’t going to freak out on me again). One of the free games Sony offered up to PS+ members was Capcom’s Dragon’s Dogma: Dark Arisen. I won’t go too far into the details, because this isn’t really a review, but it’s basically an Elder Scrolls game if the Elder Scrolls games were any good.
One of DD:DA’s features is the ability to take your own in-game screenshots. Like my occasional Hakuna Matata posts, I thought I’d post my Dragon’s Dogma screenshots and maybe throw in a little flavor text as to what’s going on.
Let me begin by saying this: I love Atlus. I think all of their games are great, whether they be Megami Tensei, Devil Summoner, Persona, whatever. They’re a company whose products have entertained me for years.
Now be prepared to be convinced otherwise as I write about how completely fucking shit Persona 4 Arena is.
P4A is a one-on-one fighting game spun off from Persona 4 (naturally), a Playstation 2 RPG. It was not developed by Atlus themselves, though. Rather, it was sub-contracted to Arc System Works, known for Guilty Gear, a series that features a guy with a bag over his head, a generic anime dude named after a Freddie Mercury song, a heavily sexualized crossdresser who is like sixteen years old or something really gross like that, and a system of game mechanics that I can only describe as “probably ridiculously obtuse on purpose to put on a facade of depth.” I don’t like Guilty Gear, but I gave Persona 4 Arena a shot because hey, I like Persona and maybe that will balance things out.
Things did not balance out. Persona 4 Arena is a bad, bad game. It falls on the “Katamari Forever” level of bad, in that it just can’t be content to be a shitty game; it has to actually make you feel worse for having played it.
In Persona 4- the regular RPG Persona 4, one of the characters (and my personal favorite) is a guy named Kanji Tatsumi. Kanji is a teenager struggling with his sexual identity. He’s very much into dudes and his hobbies include things like sewing (not particularly a “gay” thing, but in the eyes of a teenager it probably is (I haven’t been a teenager in some time, things are all new and different)), but not wanting to be seen as being less than a manly man, he adopts a tough guy attitude; getting into fights for no reason and trying to intimidate anyone who talks to him. I won’t go on and on about his P4 character, but I really enjoyed his portrayal of not being some lame ass stereotype with a limp wrist and high pitced voice trying to bang all of the male characters because gay people am I right. It was surprisingly deep and well-handled in a game where the main message was the tired anime cliche of “friendship and believing in yourself will beat the villain!”
Kanji is the worst character in Persona 4 Arena. He’s slower than everybody. His attacks have no range. His attacks can and will be out-prioritized by any other characters’ moves. Playing as Kanji is just telling your opponent, “I’m giving you a free win.” He’s a joke. This is bull shit.
Trying to play this game over the internet (because taking on human opponents is the whole point of the fighting game genre) is just an exercise in hopelessness and frustration. The netcode is garbage (it makes Dark Souls seem silky smooth in comparison) and when combined with the complete character imbalance, flat out sucks. It’s just Arc System Works giving you the finger for giving a damn about these characters- Fuck You, you’ll like who We want you to like. Getting juggled infinitely because your controls don’t work due to a bad connection and/or you can’t counteract another players move due to a fault in the game programming and not your own skill is completely asinine and should be considered unacceptable in this day and age. And, like I mentioned earlier by linking to my Katamari Forever write-up, I felt awful after playing this online. Again, it’s just punishing me for liking this guy from another game and wanting to play as him. Wanting to learn his moves and intricacies. Wanting to get better. But you can’t and you will lose every fucking time and, although it isn’t your fault, it will sure as sugar feel that way. Feeling like shit doesn’t make me want to continue doing something, so I removed Persona 4 Arena from my Playstation 3′s hard drive, and I would recommend that you just cut out the middleman and make sure it never gets onto yours in the first place.
Every now and again, somebody will ask what kind of music I’m into. The answer is, “a bunch of different kinds.” So to be more specific, I made this list of my favorite albums. They’re presented in no particular order aside from when they popped into my head. This list is far from complete, and will be updated more over time; I’ll probably alert you to updates via Twitter or something because Lord Knows I plug this blog on Tumblr way too often.
Brief aside, my external drive, where I keep all my music, failed on me some time ago, so being able to rattle off 35 albums is nothing short of a miracle.
My Playstation 3 is a very odd, bi-polar machine that goes from working perfectly, to making weird noises that make me worry about a fire hazard, and back again. It is currently: Working Just Fine. So here’s some pictures from Hakuna Matata, since I haven’t posted about this in a while.
I’m a little out of practice with this whole, “putting my thoughts down via written word.” I have been for some time. I mean this in regards to writing things of substance, not about some dopey video game or some text post on Tumblr that gets a bizarrely high amount of notes. Let me give this a shot.
You’ve probably read my dream journal entries, about my subconscious inability to move on from the past. Lately, I’ve found myself, mostly inadvertently, attempting to relive those nostalgic memories in the real world as well. I’ve been listening to the same music, watching the same tv shows (in some cases, reruns, as some of these shows have been long since cancelled), eating the same food, and so on. Obviously, this is not a healthy or sane way to live, and I know that no matter what I do, the past will stay in the past; history will never repeat itself. But still, I just can’t seem to help myself, you know? I don’t know why this is happening. I’ve got my armchair theories, of course, but nothing I can pinpoint and yell “A-HA” at.
Certainly, at some point, this will end and everything will go back to normal. One could only hope.
Tenchu: Time of the Assassins is a PSP game exclusive to Japan and Europe (no love for God’s Country, it seems) that is, surprisingly, pretty fun to play, and also includes a level creator. So I made a level with it. Well, that’s a bit of a cop out; it’s actually a remake of a level that I made for a previous Tenchu title. You may remember it from the video playthrough I posted, fuck, almost a year ago (where does the time go?). However, the benefit of the PSP version is that you, The Reader, can actually play it for yourself, due to the ease of downloading/uploading the game files.
Instructions: Either hook up your PSP via USB connection, or just plug the memory stick into your PC (whichever works for you). Then take the downloaded zip file and place the contained folder and drag that bad boy over to your now open PSP folder. Specifically, PSP->SAVEDATA. Then just load up the game and you can play it.
hey remember that time i said that reviving cecilia (then known as consider the raven) were a really great band worth listening to and that statement somehow shot my credibility to hell, led to massive amounts of harassment directed at not only me but my family (my mother in particular was thrilled to hear how much of a “fuckin’ fag” her son was) and eventually killed off my will to ever write anything ever again until this year? some good ass shit for sure.
I’m at a store that sells nothing but Halloween decorations. My friend works here, and I’m here to talk to her. After I find her, we both put on comically oversized leather jackets and step outside. We begin a long, drawn out, somewhat philosophical discussion of Demolition, the old WWF tag team. I end every sentence with, “I miss you.”
Eventually, the conversation devolves into an argument about whether or not Crush was the worst member of Demolition; I was anti-Crush, she was pro-Crush. At this point, her sentences end with, “you retarded son of a bitch.”
She tells me to fuck off, and that she has to get back to work. The Christmas decorations need to be put up.
I keep hearing rumblings about people (sad middle aged white dudes) wanting to start up an “anti-pc” (political correctness) rally. I’m morbidly curious as to how this would play out. Would it just be, let’s be honest, a low double digit number of loud fuckers holding up signs like, “Let us say ‘nigger’” or some shit? Maybe a small-scale parade with a line of Rascals, imitating the Shriners? Maybe some sort of remark about Michelle Obama’s suggestion to drink more water to be about drinking American Piss instead? How would this work? Why has this been on my mind for the last three hours? Do I have any Right-Winger Shithead readers that can answer this?